just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
he laminated a picture of his dick.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
