I think I am morally bankrupt
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
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