Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
