Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
My sheets look like a crime scene.
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
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