do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Randomize