I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
