okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
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