Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
