No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Randomize
