Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.