I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
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I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
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They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.