I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
