it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
