Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Randomize
