I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
