he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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