Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
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Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
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Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
So, my ex just showed me the drunk voicemail we left him last night. Started out with me saying "I think it's Shane." Then you took my phone and started singing a song about peanut butter, train tracks, and tequila. I joined in. On the upside, he said he's totally fine with being on the drunk dial list from now on. Soooo, another tequila night??
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
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