Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize