found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
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