"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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