I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
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You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
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