so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
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