I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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