My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
Randomize
