put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Don't tell me you're on acid again
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
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