Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
