Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
