i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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