I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
