She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize