why do cheetos always look like penises
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
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