Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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