so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
Randomize
