I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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