You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
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