Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
