Do vagina's smell?
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
