My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Randomize
