8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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