no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
