so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.