well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize
