She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
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