Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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