That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
