i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
