why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
Randomize
