i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
did i walk over a car last night?
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
