Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
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