I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
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