She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Randomize